Random jokes
Drowning Lawyer ->
How do you prevent a Lawyer from drowning? Shoot him before he hits the water!... [ca造 ->]
MasterCard for Men ->
You've all seen the sentimental MasterCard commercials. Well, finally there is a MasterCard commercial targeted just for men: (No offense ladies - just enjoy it for what it's worth) Cover charge: $15.00 Round of drinks: 23.00 Table dance: ... [ca造 ->]
Bellybuttons ->
- How come blonde girls have bruises around and in their bellybuttons? - I don't know...Why? - Because blonde boys are stupid as well!... [ca造 ->]
Dinosaurs ->
Whats a lesbian dinosaur? A lickalotofpuss ! Whats a gay dinosaur? A lickdicknopuss !... [ca造 ->]
One Upmanship ->
Two kids were having the standard argument about whose father could beat up whose father. One boy said, "My father is better than your father." The other kid said, "Well, my mother is better than your mother." The first boy paused and then r... [ca造 ->]
Diaper Change ->
Q: Why does a blonde only change her baby's diapers every month? A: Because it says right on it "good for up to 20 pounds."... [ca造 ->]
Daffynition ->
Daffynition: Hummingbird- A bird who forgot the lines to a song!... [ca造 ->]
Here kitty kitty kitty ->
This chick goes to her docter and tells him that she can??t get any from her husband. So he gives her some pills and says ??they are experimental pills, put two into his coffee and see what happens?. So she does and the next morning come back... [ca造 ->]
Learning to Cuss ->
Two little kids, aged six and eight, decide it's time to learn how to swear. So, the eight-year-old says to the six-year-old, "Okay, you say ass' and I'll say hell'". All excited about their plan, they troop downstairs, where their mother asks the... [ca造 ->]
I knew it was true...I knew it! ->
Well, if there's any truth to this study at all, then I should live to be 180 minimum! :) From the New England Journal of Medicine: Great news for girl watchers: Ogling over women's breasts is good for a man's health and can add years to his li... [ca造 ->]
Virgin ->
A mature woman was in the pastorial study counseling for her upcoming fourth wedding. "Father, how am I going to tell my husband that I am still a virgin?" "My child, you have been a married woman for many years. Surely that cannot be." "Wel... [ca造 ->]
Virgina Girl ->
A young West Virginian girl wanted to go to college at UVA. But her father said 'No Way! You're going to By-God West Virginia Univ.' Well she got her way and she went to UVA. The first semester went by, and she wrote home that she was getting marr... [ca造 ->]
Loving it up at 85! ->
At 85 years of age, a somewhat senile Morris marries Luanne, a lovely 25-year-old. Because her new husband is so old, Luanne decides that on their wedding night, she and Morris should have separate bedrooms. The newlywed is concerned that her new ... [ca造 ->]
What do you call a boomerang... ->
Q: What do you call a boomerang that doesn't come back? A: A stick!... [ca造 ->]
COMMAND REDUCTION OF ARMY PERSONNEL ( C.R.A.P. ) ->
As a result of DOD budget cutbacks, we are forced to reduce the size of the force. Under CRAP, older soldiers will go on early retirement, thus permitting the retention of lower paid soldiers who represent the Army's future. A program to phase out... [ca造 ->]